Gabriel's Horn

A terribly biased view of sports through the Eyes of Texas.

Archive for the ‘Dick Cheney is a bad motha – shut yo mouth!’ Category

Well, actually we were lying…

Posted by TxHny on September 15, 2011

We were totally dead.  You should have known, since we categorized the last post as “empty promises.”

Basically, TxHny and The Masked Wino, n/k/a RubyLynn got real jobs, got married, and had very busy lives.  Gabriel’s Horn fell by the wayside.  I know, we sparked a fire in your previously suppressed abandonment issues, which took copious amounts of booze to rebury. We’re sorry.

BUT – just in time for your birthday, we’re back. Check us out on http://www.texas-toast.com, our new blog about everything important, which includes college and pro football, traveling, cooking, a bunch of grown up crapola, and the content you’ve been missing terribly.

Oh wait? You didn’t miss us? At all? This is why we abandoned you in the first place you ungrateful brat!

Please read our new blog. You aren’t a brat. We’re sorry.

Posted in Dick Cheney is a bad motha - shut yo mouth!, empty promises, Get your act together dammit, txhny, we're sorry | Leave a Comment »

Dick Cheney Says…

Posted by RubyLynn on November 29, 2007

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Bruins are easier prey than quail … or lawyers.

Posted in basketball, Dick Cheney is a bad motha - shut yo mouth!, themaskedwino | 5 Comments »

Dick Cheney Says…

Posted by RubyLynn on November 5, 2007

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Good Riddance.

Posted in Dick Cheney is a bad motha - shut yo mouth! | Leave a Comment »

Dick Cheney Says…

Posted by RubyLynn on October 5, 2007

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“If Oklahoma beats Texas… the terrorists win.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Dick Cheney is a bad motha - shut yo mouth!, Oklahoma, themaskedwino | 2 Comments »

Big XII Roundtable – State of the Conference Address

Posted by TxHny on September 28, 2007

This week the Bix XII Roundtable hosted over at Crimson and Cream Machine returns. I’ve been frankly quite busy with work, so I’ve let my good friend write the post for me. He’s a little media shy so we’ll just call him “G. W.” to protect his personal privacy. Privacy is very important to G. W. (*Cough* *cough – wheeze* Patriot Act *cough*. You’ll have to excuse me, my allergies are killing me. Damn ragweed. *Sneeze*)

The Big 12 conference has only four unbeaten teams left and has endured numerous embarrassing performances on television. State where you believe the Big 12 ranks among the BCS conferences.

“What are you talking about? Of course the Big XII is the best conference in the world. What? You think the SEC, the Big East, or pff the Pac 10 can mess with us? Don’t mess with Texas. You fool me once well, shame on you. Fool me twice, and you aren’t going to fool me twice. Ya got that? Heh, heh, heh.”

What has been the conference’s best victory and worst defeat so far this season?

“What we need to discuss is the battle at hand: terrorists! We have to devote all possible resources and manpower to taking out these ‘ax-eeze’ of power. We’ve got the terrorists on the run. We’re keeping them on the run. One by one the terrorists are learning the meaning of Longhorn justice.”

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The Kingpin, Enemy #1

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Frandullah, Enemy #2

“Our worst defeat to date, is the loss of Oklahoma State against the City of Troy. I saw 300, and those guys are some bad sons-a-bitches. You see, the… thing is what they need to do is get over to Norman, to get Stoops-bollah to stop doing this shit and it’s over.”

Conference Power Rankings. The best part of the roundtable is voicing how we believe the conference teams rank each week, from top to bottom. So, go ahead, let us know who’s up and who’s down in your book this week.

  1. Oklahoma
  2. Dick Cheney
  3. Texas
  4. Missouri
  5. Nebraska
  6. Kansas
  7. Texas Tech
  8. Kansas State
  9. Oklahoma State
  10. Texas A&M
  11. Baylor
  12. Colorado
  13. Iowa State

There you have it. You may have noticed that there are a few questions missing. G. W. has been known to dance around topics that may upset particular constituents every now and then. Nobody really questions him and you shouldn’t either. I hear his friend Richard backs him up (and that guy eats glass shards and pickled baby feet for breakfast).

Posted in Big 12, blog love, Dick Cheney is a bad motha - shut yo mouth!, empty promises, Oklahoma, Roundtables, Texas A&M, txhny | 3 Comments »