Gabriel's Horn

A terribly biased view of sports through the Eyes of Texas.

Pay Per View?!

Posted by TxHny on August 31, 2007

While two of your authors will most certainly be at the game, we’re appalled the remainder of the 23 million Texans (not to mention Texas alums out of state) will have to shell out 30 bucks to catch the season opener. (And before the fans from other Texas universities chime in, you know you watch Texas games. Keep your enemies close, right?) The good points of this plan include retaining both arms and legs as a result of not purchasing season tickets, simultaneous beverage consumption with game watching and potentially avoiding contact with any Arkansas fans (which did not go well for me personally in 2004) — we can hardly believe someone hasn’t done something. Now I ask you, WWLD? (What Would Ladybird Do?) She’d have gotten us the game on network television. Rules, my friend, do not apply to Ladybird Johnson.

lady_bird_johnson1.jpg
WWLD? Not put up with PPV.

Since there is in fact nothing we can do about the Pay Per View situation, you have one of three options:

1) Shell out the 30 bucks, call some friends and neighbors over and try this or this. And of course, have some Skinny Dip.

Advisable. You’ll still get to see Charles singe the grass as he blazes down the field and provided you don’t live in Oklahoma, you probably have air conditioning and will be out of the rain. Plus, you can’t have a beer in DKR.

2) Watch the game at a kickass bar like Third Base (6th&Mopac) and spend that 30 bucks on beer. Casual enough that you don’t feel odd in your Texas T-shirt, but classy enough that the floor doesn’t contain “bar sludge.” Perks: a couple of pool tables, shuffleboard, and excellent staff.

Also advisable. Make some instant friends out of strangers, and you’ll be able to catch the rest of college cupcake games on the various screens.

3) Just miss the first week of college football. You know, catch up on some reading. Clean out the fridge. Play a little Xbox.

And be dead to us.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: